NOW

NOW

I find myself in the same state of mind as I was in at 19yrs of age, in looking for new employment after 26yrs of dedication and now a part of the massive layoff. When I was young I was scared of the big world, not ready for me and I not ready for it.

My sister helped me get my foot in the door. I had many mentors in a time where not having a college degree didn’t matter, but hard work and ethics did. In the end not many mentors were left and ethics, what are ethics? It became a competitive environment in a crazy corporate world, with all grabbing the rails to stay on the sinking ship.

Now I am 46yrs of age and still not ready for the world as I have known it. I’m not sure I want to do the jobs I’ve done all these years, unappreciated, bullied, second guessed, but I have no idea where to begin to start this second phase of life. I have no leads, no heart or drive to figure it all out. Fear and worry take over me.

I am counting on Publishers Clearing House coming to my door any day now. Lord knows I have sent in my entries since I was 18yrs old. So my doorbell is working, for my luck is due. But Lord I just don’t know what I want to do.

So as written in my recent poem “A Crossroad”, I’ll do my very best and hope and pray for the same, in this new life changing quest.

Wish me luck!!